April 2017

A GIFT DELAYED

It was another of many moves, and I had packing down to an art. I was sitting on the floor of our tiny bedroom-slash-office sorting things that I would be sending off to our son Luke, now living in Florida.

There was a time when he (Luke) had been forwarding packages to our home, and it was this arrangement that caused me to set aside a box that had arrived many years before, misplaced in one of the previous shuffles of moving and storage.  Well, it had never been returned to him, and there it was staring me in the face, in the midst of packing paper, boxes and stacks of organized chaos.

As I collected my thoughts mid-stream, much like trying to gather spawning salmon into a basket, thoughts of expenses, movers, hours of sleep I hoped for, utilities to set up, scheduling and the like, I stared blankly at the package.  Then it struck me that the return address on the package was not Luke’s, but his brother, Micah’s, former address.  I was dumbstruck. How could I have missed this and put away this package, unopened, from who-knows-when? My stomach sinking, I began to tear open the brown paper.

Inside was a Christmas gift, prettily wrapped, bow and label intact. Gingerly, I opened the present from Christmas Past, utterly void of expectation.  I lifted a beautiful wall ornament in the shape of a cross, out of the box, ornately carved, bejeweled with luminescent red points, and inscribed with verse from Isaiah 53:5-6 “But he was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon Him, and by His wounds we are healed”……”And the Lord has laid upon Him the iniquity of us all.”

The words, Amazing Grace, were written through the middle of the cross.

            A memory suddenly burst forth, and I recalled that Micah had sent a gift which he had talked to me about, and we thought had been lost in the mail – nine years ago.

Now, there was no stopping my tears. My dear son. Grief overwhelmed me, as though no time had passed since Micah’s death – a year following the mailing of the gift.

Just as then, regret crushed me – I wished I could thank him!

The loss pierced me -- I wished I could hold him!

 Then…something else occurred that I did not expect -- joy washed over me -- and I was able to receive this gift from Micah with love, and comfort, and forgiveness.  

When we fear that we won’t be able to remember our loved ones in the fullest sense over time, God reveals that not only will we remember, but we will find new joy in the remembering that we cannot even imagine.